Help yourself by realizing your true desires
Help yourself by realizing your true desires
Now that you know the vice president wants to replace your boss, you must act as though you don’t know. Focus on your current job and avoid acting like the heir apparent. Don’t get in the habit of going around your boss, despite the VP’s invitation to do so.
Text“I’ve got a problem. I don’t like my job and I’m not a star performer. On a good day I worry that I’m going to be fired. On a bad day I’m afraid to go to work. Our company is going through a reorganization. We’ve been told to expect layoffs. I’m sure to be one of the first people let go. All I do is worry: I don’t have the confidence to interview outside the company or the emotional strength to stick with the current situation until it’s resolved.
Don’t misunderstand. I like to work and I can work hard but I need a job that I enjoy, that makes a difference and is appreciated. I don’t have that with my current company. I need your help to know what to do, where to go and how to get there.”
I can help you help yourself. To do that, I need to be sure I understand your situation. Tell me if what I heard is what you said: Every working day is a struggle because you feel incompetent and concerned that you’ll lose your job. Your confidence has evaporated and you don’t know how to restore it. You don’t want to stay, you’re afraid to leave, and you’re running out of options.
“That’s right. My confidence is so low I’m afraid that if I can find another job, it will be worse than the one I have now.”
When was the last time you felt good about work?
“I’ve been thinking about that a lot lately. It was 15 years ago. I was in high school and I worked after school and weekends.”
What were you doing?
“You name it! I was a dog walker, baby sitter and part-time personal assistant for two-career couples and families. I’d buy their groceries, organize their meals and cook. Besides that, I planned children’s birthday parties, and I even organized parties for my parent’s friends. I’d work with a budget, take care of invitations, shop, arrange flowers and food, serve, and clean up, after. I loved it all and made good money doing it.”
You do like to work hard! How were those jobs different from what you do now?
“The experience was different in every way. Back then, I felt like I was my own boss. I could choose what I wanted and do things my own way. Now I have many bosses, all telling me how to do things their way. Back then, there was variety in what I did, I was accountable and my efforts mattered. Now I do the same thing every day and it’s unclear who’s responsible or accountable. I’m no one special, sitting in plain sight. I don’t make a difference, and no one knows that I have talent — least of all me.”
What keeps you from running your own business now?
“It’s ironic that you ask that question. I was just talking with my sister-in-law about what I used to do and how much I enjoyed it. She said that if I was interested, she had friends and neighbors who could send me as much work as I could handle.”
Would you like that?
“I’d like that very much. The idea has been in the back of my mind for years and I’ve never acted on it. I think I’m ready to. I learned a lot about myself from that business and I have a lot to learn about running a business. Just thinking about the possibilities makes this the first time I’ve been excited about work in a long, long time. It’s a good feeling.” Are you ready to get started?
“Yes, I am.” Joyce Richman is a speaker and career coach conducting seminars and workshops throughout the United States, and the author of "Roads, Routes & Ruts: A Guidebook for Career Success." You can reach her at 288-1799 or JERichman@aol.com. Watch Joyce Richman's latest career advice Wednesdays at 6:35 a.m. during "The Good Morning Show" on WFMY News 2 or visit http://www.digtriad.com/business/columnists/career_minute/
